Vortex
Hybrid strain: Usually 80% Sativa + 20% Indica



"I kept hearing about the Vortex, I gotta try it, gotta write about it. Patients were tweeting about it, and from what I could find online the strain was particularly effective at squashing depressive chemical imbalances. I personally struggle with dark moods and have always looked for strains that can help me manage that tendency. My preferred co-operative had no trouble with me requesting it by name, and Vortex sure makes a first impression. It has those electric colors. It reminded me of the University of Miami Hurricanes. Neon greens and bright orange hairs, plenty of crystalline structure but tended to concentrate more in the center of the bud.

Vortex didn’t have the lingering smell I expected and I kind of appreciated that. It makes the elevator ride in my apartment easier since I was stuck stopping on every floor with 5 people in the lift. As I broke it down for my experiment, a one-gram joint smoked end-to-end, which is my procedure for all reviews – I noticed a concentration of odor stored within the bud. It reminded me of some of my favorite Humboldt outdoor strains. There wasn’t much kick as the hemp paper burned, and I figured it must be a slow starter. I noticed a pleasant body high that came on within minutes, but struggled finishing the joint as my throat and nostrils were a bit offended by the essence of the plant. It wasn’t overwhelming, but it was more harsh then I expected.

My main takeaway from this strain was it made me smiley. I did experience the positive vibes that I heard accompany this medication, and it seemed to live up to it’s billing as a depressive combatant. A miracle worker it was not, but I wasn’t overwhelmed with socially awkwardness and enjoyed my trip to Whole Foods. I would characterize it as a social strain. The disappointment was in the lingering effects, as this sunny disposition didn’t last as long as hoped. I chased my official test subject joint with a few pulls from my Roor bong and wasn’t able to repeat the euphoria that lasted about 25 minutes during my initial flight. I could envision patients chasing that feeling and over-medicating, and I also could see how this strain has addictive qualities which explains the patients who swear by it to no end. All in all I was pleased with the experience, but found myself longing for other strains that have been my go-to medications for years. No knock on Vortex, but with a name like that I was expecting something dramatic and all what I got was more like re-runs of a good TV show."

4E+ verdict: Fun, but not worth the hype
Review by Chauncey Rollups, 4E+ staff cannabis critic