I've been with my wife for about 3 years now and I'm starting to have erection difficulties.
My Wife and I have different views on what the cause is :-
She bought me some Viagra...
I bought her a treadmill...
Bundy75 (19-04-19), CityDweller (01-04-19), Easy-T (01-04-19), GEORGE (27-04-19), ggotch (01-04-19), Ironman (06-04-19), lipnobody (04-04-19), LondonSeedCentre (02-04-19)
I knew a local family whose daughter was massively overweight and very unnattractive. I remember one day her mum came and spoke in assembly, explaining that her daughter had hanged herself last night as a result of the constant bullying...
The whole school was in shocked silence until one lad shouted out, "fuck, that must have been a strong rope"
Bundy75 (19-04-19), CityDweller (01-04-19), Easy-T (06-04-19), GEORGE (27-04-19), Ironman (06-04-19), lipnobody (04-04-19), LondonSeedCentre (02-04-19), M_C (06-04-19)
Seen a bloke the other day at the cemetery balling in front of a head stone as I approached him I could hear him saying, why did you leave I wish you would come back I can not cope, I asked him if he was ok and who he was talking to he replied this is my wife’s ex husband
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AND (06-04-19), Bundy75 (19-04-19), CityDweller (26-04-19), Easy-T (06-04-19), GEORGE (27-04-19), Ironman (06-04-19), lipnobody (07-04-19), LondonSeedCentre (06-04-19)
Teacher says to class today is poetry day when I pick u out I want you to stand up and give me a poem with the word pistol in it.
Molly your poem pleas
(Molly) my daddy is a police man he has a suit of blue he Carries around a truncheon and sometimes a pistol to.
(Teacher)paddy your poem pleas
(Paddy) my daddy is not a police man he has no suit of blue he's at the pub at ten n he's on the PISS TILL TWO
AND (14-04-19), Bundy75 (19-04-19), CityDweller (26-04-19), Easy-T (14-04-19), GEORGE (27-04-19)
What do you get when you eat cannabis?
A pot belly.
My neighbour knocked on my door in the early hours this morning.
He said, "Your car alarm has been going off all night mate. I've got to go to work in a few hours and I've had no sleep."
"Stop worrying," I replied. "I've got a steering lock on it!"
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AND (26-04-19), Bundy75 (26-04-19), CityDweller (26-04-19), Dr Green (09-05-19), GEORGE (27-04-19), IceCalibur (26-04-19), M_C (26-04-19)
What do you call a magic dog?
A labracadabrador
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