Page 3 of 5 FirstFirst 1 2 3 4 5 LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 49

Thread: The insane rantings of a normal person.

  1. #21

    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Location
    On a quest
    Posts
    7,860
    Thanks
    3,403
    Been Thanked: 6,317 Times

    Default

    ah so this is where the blogs are
    ive read it already cock!

    and nice yanks? narr dont believe it lol

    G

  2. The Following User Says Thank You to Forest For This Useful Post:

    CockRoach (10-03-11)

  3. #22

    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    11,627
    Thanks
    7,318
    Been Thanked: 7,184 Times

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BURNZ View Post
    Cock ! What the fuck you on about now ? lol

    You should really try getting a job ya lazy bastard ! Plus don't you know daytime t.v will rot your brain
    i got one didnt i! part time mischief consultant to my lil bro.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sativa Steve View Post
    PMSL. Cock gets more entertaining by the day.
    You should get your own newsletter/email sponsered by thctalk, sent out weekly to all members of thct.
    You could be our stoner journalist. Giving us your take on this weeks news. Just a thought.
    lol sounds like fun tbh - we'll see how bad ths bloggin lark goes 1st tho eh

    i was thinking of writing up one of me stoner tales and seeing if nuffsaid wanted to use it - dunno if hes liable tho lol

  4. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to CockRoach For This Useful Post:

    BURNZ (11-03-11), Sativa Steve (10-03-11)

  5. #23

    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    1,063
    Thanks
    496
    Been Thanked: 448 Times

    Default

    how about the jeremy kyle die detector test, you fail graham comes out and bludgeons you with his chin
    you build blidge, you build blidge now

    Diddy's Trifle

    Diddy's Church Scrog

    Diddy does butane oil

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to diddymao For This Useful Post:

    CockRoach (10-03-11)

  7. #24

    Join Date
    Feb 2011
    Posts
    1,063
    Thanks
    496
    Been Thanked: 448 Times

    Default

    smoking some sick cheese its like crack, i feel like going raving, some one fetch me my dummy and my glow sticks

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to diddymao For This Useful Post:

    Sativa Steve (10-03-11)

  9. #25

    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Location
    On a giant organic spaceship....
    Posts
    6,253
    Thanks
    4,080
    Been Thanked: 2,934 Times

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by diddymao View Post
    smoking some sick cheese its like crack, i feel like going raving, some one fetch me my dummy and my glow sticks
    PMSL at this.

    I miss raving

  10. #26

    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    11,627
    Thanks
    7,318
    Been Thanked: 7,184 Times

    Default

    The Insane Rantings of a Normal Person

    Part 2, Being Stoned........good aint it.

    1st time i got stoned i was in my 1st yr of secondary school (yr7) and one bored summer lunchtime i ended up talking myself into going half’s on a 10bag of “skunk” with an older kid called Craig.. think i was about 13 or so..anyways long story short.. i decided its probably best to not smoke it in school since i was a ganja newb and all that jazz. So i said we will smoke it after school and hes said we could go to his cos him mum let him smoke and all that (i later found out she didn’t let him at all... she was just one of those posh mums who couldn’t tell her shitbrat nothing lol)

    So after school i call the mothership from one of those old BT phone boxs, that if kicked hard enough near the handle, it would instantly lock some poor bastard in until he kicked it just as hard back...which was far from easy because we needed a run up of around 10 ft and the poor git locked in “public phone box of humiliation” only had a 1ft run up lmao – and believe me it made one hell of a bang if you were inside the box on the receiving end, that i know from experience, if you see one and your with a mate get him to go in and get that fucker back for shagging your sister..... you wont regret it. Kids eh! i spose it was just our equivalent of yesterdays happy slappings and todays kneecappings im sure it wasn’t just my school who done that but of course we did it to each other too. Thats where “public phone box of humiliation” started lol
    Yes i am aware i kinda went off the subject there, but don’t think of this as a “thing” you are reading. think of it as a conversation where you cant speak and you should follow fine.

    As i was saying..... after school i call the mothership from one of those old BT phone boxs and ask if permission would be granted for me to go to a mates house to play some Golden Axe on the megadrive. The mothership confirmed this was an acceptable request and advised me to be back in barracks by 9pm or my left bum cheek would face “court marshal” = leather belt weighed about half a kilo....nice!... but only if you have no feeling from the elbows down.(shit, someone qualified better hug me quick)

    Right! Back to it...so me and Craig. Oops sorry! ....Craig and I jump on the bus and go to his house... (Oh! And this was when it cost me 40p in the morning to get to school and 60p after school to get back home, im not even gonna start on transport! thats a whole new episode of the insane rantings of a normal person)
    So we get in his front door where he is greeted by his ever so posh mother, who seemed like a pleasant lady “oh hello Craig how was your day darling?...would you and your new friend like some caviar... ill have jeeves catch you some fresh salmon from the pond to the rear of the estate pronto”
    Yeah so like i said Craig just basically f*cks his mum off sharpish and we go up about 7 flights of stairs then a ladder to get to his converted loft room – which was uffing cool to me at the time lol

    And it is here, where my journey begins......always f*ckin wanted to say that!

    I'm not gona bore you with the details of the actual smoking experience because i actually cant remember the details lol but i vaguely remember it being quite hilarious and those 4 and half hours or so i was in that loft getting more baked than a 12:30 cheese and onion pasty from greggs, it felt more like 8hrs of juvenile newbie smashing devil superskunk and pepsi induced hilarity.

    Like i said, that's about all i remember about that but next part of the tale is me getting off the bus near my house and walking up my road with all kinds of crazy thoughts whizzing around in my head (i looked like that wazzock from the talkt2frank ad... honest) i remember thinking....

    “shit this is proper fun this is aint it man *hears own laugh in head* shit thats funny cos your talking to yourself like im not you... or myself even??. *laughs back at other self* i dunno what your laughing at man your like 20 yrds from the mothership you better stop talking to me and sort yourself out”.... At this point i think the best word to describe my state would possibly be... paranoid.

    Makes me laugh now because looking back, there was nothing i could’ve done to stop the mothership seeing my eyes looking something like what a seasoned drinkers eyes would look like after a 6 day bender with no sleep. And going in the house like speedy Gonzales, popping my head around the front room door and saying in the space of what felt like 2.36 seconds “hi mum im back but im tired so im going to go to sleep..see you in the morning.... nite” certainly wasn’t one of the best moves i made (in retrospect probably one of the best mistakes i ever made lol but thats another episode again;D)
    So i zoomed off into me room and..... F*ck it! ...look im not gonna kid you or me lol, i feckin knew there was 0% chance the mothership was not going to notice that kinda odd behaviour so ill just get to it. She interrogated me for about 3mins until i cracked....before you judge me, i was young and inexperienced ok and you don’t know my mum lol.. so it went bit like this......

    Mothership - ”several threats i cant remember and lots of swearing”
    Me “ok ok man just chill the fuck out man i just had some weed alright”
    Mothership –“had some fucking weeed??!!”
    Me - “yeah what! You smoke it”
    Mothership – “im i fucking adult you little bastard” (which was and is still bollox. Not the bastard bit. The her being an adult bit )
    Me – “well what anyway im not gona die so just let me go to sleep and leave me alone innit”
    Mothership – “again many swear words...who gave it to you etc etc”
    Me – “im not saying was me and some mates , you aint the boss of meeeeeee!!! im nearly 14!! Just go and tell someone who cares you can't say nothing you smoke it so you're just a hypocrite”
    Mothership - *....censored.......scenes of violence......censored.....*

    And that’s nearly the end of the story, im just getting to the moral or the point or whatever it is.

    My mothership smoked shitbar in front of me for as long as i can remember – and never once offered me a measly toke, knowing what i know now that was a good thing – well not really, cos i smoked shitbar for years after in school as decent bud was hard to come by then for a 14yr old lol.
    But i haven’t touched it for years now and now im proud to say my mothership is running on unleaded superskunk fuel cos of me informing her of the crap that shitbar is often tainted with i know i know.. another one in the bag;D

    And btw, i just realised there is no feckin point to this at all.... and why should there be.

    Until next time....and remember fukoes...be good, and if you cant be good, be careful
    Last edited by New Age Outlaw; 11-03-11 at 11:27 PM. Reason: Power trip

  11. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to CockRoach For This Useful Post:

    Sativa Steve (11-03-11)

  12. #27

    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Location
    Pannonia
    Posts
    1,130
    Thanks
    298
    Been Thanked: 1,127 Times

    Default

    I've learnt to laugh now at my paranoid inner ramblings.

    My first experience was quite so interesting at the age of 14.

    1.I had a go on a bong
    2. Coughed up a lung
    3. Felt ill (I couldn't handle feeling stoned!)
    4. Went to bed
    5. Woke up stoned
    6. Had munchies
    7. Wanted to have another go on the bong but brother had gone into town


    TheRealFeanor is my name: And Canna is my nation: Cyber space is my dwelling place: The stars my destination

  13. The Following User Says Thank You to TheRealFeanor For This Useful Post:

    CockRoach (11-03-11)

  14. #28

    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    3,904
    Thanks
    504
    Been Thanked: 1,967 Times

    Default

    feck me cock your getting a bit carried away now aint you ? as if i can be arsed to read your latest novel .

    since you like a nice rant , if you aint seen it already go and download the whole lot of curb your enthusiasm , the best comedy going i think you'll enjoy it.



    and isnt calling yourself normal stretching it a bit ?

  15. The Following User Says Thank You to bergkamp For This Useful Post:

    CockRoach (11-03-11)

  16. #29

    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Posts
    11,627
    Thanks
    7,318
    Been Thanked: 7,184 Times

    Default

    ahhh shit man i diddnt think it managed to post this last night - lappy went all crazy on me - so it looks messy and stuff cos i was gonna change it a bit this morning - ahh well lol

    outlaw will fix it up for me im sure

  17. The Following User Says Thank You to CockRoach For This Useful Post:

    New Age Outlaw (11-03-11)

  18. #30

    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Location
    On a giant organic spaceship....
    Posts
    6,253
    Thanks
    4,080
    Been Thanked: 2,934 Times

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by CockRoach View Post
    B
    one of those old BT phone boxs, that if kicked hard enough near the handle. would instantly lock some poor bastard in until he kicked it just as hard back...
    I got locked in one of them at about age 11, and my so called "friends" at the time then continued to throw smoke bombs in there with me.. All I remember is laying on the floor trying to breathe out the bottom bits!

  19. The Following User Says Thank You to Sativa Steve For This Useful Post:

    CockRoach (11-03-11)

Page 3 of 5 FirstFirst 1 2 3 4 5 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Ridiculous to the Insane
    By Dirk Gently in forum General Stoners Discussion
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 23-01-11, 09:03 PM
  2. Ken Block Gymkhana INSANE Driving skills
    By Jāck Herer in forum General Stoners Discussion
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 23-12-10, 09:37 PM
  3. robocop the insane version.
    By prime in forum General Stoners Discussion
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 13-11-10, 08:32 PM
  4. insane motorbike rider
    By two-minds in forum News/Current Affairs
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 09-05-09, 09:32 AM
  5. I just can't decide. It's driving me insane!!! Grrr
    By Grape101 in forum Music & Multimedia
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 11-11-07, 07:30 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  


THCtalk.com Disclaimer - You must be over 18 years old to view/use this site .THCtalk.com does not encourage growing Cannabis or possessing Cannabis. Learning how to grow Cannabis instructions should be for educational purposes only. All Information contained in this web site is for: Historical reference, Scientific reference and Educational purposes only. Visitors to this website are advised against breaking the law as It is illegal to smoke, grow, or possess cannabis in the UK and some US States