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Thread: share ur jokes here

  1. #3351

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    Pretty weird to think that the only guy in entertainment who wasn't a sex criminal was Benny Hill.

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  3. #3352

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    As I sat myself opposite my Chinese girlfriend I said, "You know what, I really don't know why people are of the opinion that all oriental's look the same?"

    "Who the fuck are you?" she replied.

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  5. #3353

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    Instead of getting my wife a new ring, I got her 4 new rings.

    Or a 'hob' as it's more commonly known.

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  7. #3354

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    I was the getaway driver for a robbery at a paper factory in Bristol last night.

    We took the A4.

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  9. #3355

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    It was reported this week that many of those who were abused by Jimmy Savile have turned to alcohol abuse in the years since.

    The BBC are looking to commission a new show to support this group of victims.

    Gin'll Fix It

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  11. #3356

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    Just got a job playing the triangle in a reggae band, and ting.

    https://www.thctalk.com/cannabis-foru...ad.php?t=77779
    2weeks veg

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  13. #3357

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    I was installing a light in the loft today, when I slipped off a joist and put my foot right through the bedroom ceiling. It scared the shit out of my girlfriend.

    I'm not surprised though, she kicked me out last August.

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  15. #3358

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    I don't know where I'd be without my mum.

    Probably wiped up in a tissue.

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  17. #3359

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    "I have a foot fetish", I told my psychiatrist.

    "That doesn't make you crazy", he replied, "in fact, I also get turned on by looking at beautiful women's feet."

    "Really?" I said. "Do you want to come over to mine and see my collection?"

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  19. #3360

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    The new barman in the pub is black, so I said to him, "Beer please, nigger."

    He hit the roof and said, "Why don't we swap places, let's see how you like it."

    So I went round the bar, he walked out then came back in and said, "Beer please, honkey."
    I said, "Sorry mate, we don't serve niggers in here."

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